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By Neal A. Shipman
Farmer Editor
MOMS ALSO SAY THE DARNDEST THINGS!
From all of the positive comments I heard following last week’s column on what some kids have to say about their mothers, I guess the general consensus would be that everyone enjoys a good story at Mom’s expense. I know that is the truth at our house as our two sons absolutely delight in poking fun at their mom.
Somehow or another throughout history, moms have no doubt been the subject to the same kind of lovingly abuse. But you know, sometimes Moms can also say the darndest things.
So in keeping with spreading a little humor, touched with a lot of love, this Mother’s Day, I hope that you enjoy some quotes that moms of some very famous people could very well have said at one time or another to their children.
Read on and enjoy . . . . .
COLUMBUS’ MOTHER
"I don’t care what you’ve discovered, you still
could have written!"
MICHELANGELO’S MOTHER
"Can’t you paint on walls like other children? Do
you have any idea how hard it is to get that stuff off the ceiling?"
NAPOLEON’S MOTHER
"All right, if you aren’t hiding your report card
inside your jacket, take your hand out of there and show me."
MARY’S MOTHER
"I’m not upset that your lamb followed you to
school, but I would like to know how he got a better grade than you."
GEORGE WASHINGTON’S MOTHER
"The next time I catch you throwing money across the
Potomac, you can kiss your allowance good-bye!"
THOMAS EDISON’S MOTHER
"Of course I’m proud that you invented the electric
light bulb. Now turn it off and get to bed!"
PAUL REVERE’S MOTHER
"I don’t care where you think you have to go, young
man, midnight is past your curfew."
ALBERT EINSTEIN’S MOTHER
"But it’s your senior picture. Can’t you do
something about your hair? OY! Styling gel, mousse, something...?"
So to all the mothers out there, while you may not get all of the respect that you deserve, never doubt that you are loved far more than you’ll ever know. Happy Mother’s Day.
HAT TIPS
By Dean Meyer
“We really don’t have it all that tough!”
Hello,
What a week! We had an 80 percent chance of rain. Big rain. An inch to two inches! I was starting to have a crush on the weatherman. Whom I normally despise. Then it hit. We received 10 hundredths. With 50 mph winds, that doesn’t last too long.
Then you look to the south of us. Carm and Matt, in northwestern Harding County had a couple inches of rain and measured the snow in feet. All the power poles are down and they are talking three weeks without power.
I’ve heard of cows down with grass tetany and I’m afraid the sheep and lamb losses had to be devastating. One friend had a storage building collapse wrecking a bunch of machinery and a tractor. Farmers in the east and southeast are having a tough time getting a crop in because of wet fields. Here, fields are beginning to blow and pastures look like they did when we pulled cows out last fall
Hey, I’m not complaining! Just reporting.
Vicki Pennington recently put together a wonderful book you should read. The book is called "It Seems Like Only Yesterday." It is a compilation of memories of the residents of the Hilltop Home of Comfort at Killdeer.
What made me think of the book this morning is because I was kind of whining about being out of grass. And the wind blowing every day. And the fields being so dry. And the storms that seem more and more frequent across the world.
Then when I was sitting in the cab of the tractor chopping a bale for some bulls, I started thinking of those old guys and gals that settled this country. The ones that walked miles to school to teach kids that couldn’t speak English. The ones that lived through the ’30s with the drought and wind and hoppers and no crops and the government buying cattle to kill and bury.
I thought of the ones that got up in the morning and milked 20 cows by hand so they could have a little cream to sell for a few cents. I thought of the guys that went to work for the government building roads and bridges and libraries and sidewalks for just a few cents an hour so they could feed themselves and their families.
I thought of the people that had a shack full of kids, with no hospital for miles, and wondered at the fear they must have felt when a flu bug swept through the country.
I thought of the great quote in the book by a late neighbor, George Fenton. When asked what he was going to do if it rained, George would reply, "I guess we’ll do what we used to do in the old days. Let it rain."
I thought of an old story Grandpa Jack used to tell. When he was a brand inspector at Sioux City.
Seems they got in a card game after a long day at the stockyards. One of the brand inspectors got into the bottle a little too heavy and before you know it, he was late for supper. He called home and asked his wife, "What’s for supper?"
"Bull____!" she replied.
In a drunken voice he says, "Just fix enough for one, I’ll eat in town."
And by the time I got done remembering this morning, I was smiling.
Later,
Dean
