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Posted 12/30/14 (Tue)


There are many downsides to getting old. But, as the saying goes, “It beats the other option.” One of those downsides is discussions with friends often center on your health. We noticed it a year or so ago at a bar in Halliday. Visiting with some old college friends, whom, decades ago, talked about sports and girls, and horses and girls, and weather and girls, and cars and girls; we now talked about our physical condition.
We talked about knee surgeries, and hip replacements. We talked about stiff backs and compared hearing aids. We related the story of a guy who was showing his friend his hearing aid.
“My new hearing aid cost $6,000.”
“Six thousand dollars! What kind is it?”
“Oh, about 2:30.”
Now what brings this all about is my Christmas Day. So, bear with me even if you are not elderly.
’Twas the night before Christmas. Actually, it was two nights before Christmas that I started to get a toothache. I mean it was a TOOTH ACHE! But, being a cowboy, I figured there is no way I am going to bother a dentist over the holidays.
So, we went to Carm’s for Christmas Eve. I was a lot of fun.
We got there at four in the afternoon. I complained about my tooth until eight, then went to bed, woke Shirley at 3 a.m., and headed home to feed cows and whine about my tooth.
I spent the day taking cow antibiotics and sipping on cold water. All of Christmas Day! I didn’t bother my dentist until about noon, when he would have been sitting down to Christmas Dinner with his family. Funny how that pain can make you selfish. He was kind enough to prescribe some medication I could pick up the next day.
But by then the cow medicine was working! I had to have Shirley administer the pills with a balling gun that had previously only been used on calves. But what the heck, those pills were huge!
So, it is the dead of winter, and I am going out at night to check on calving cows. That is another story that I may some day relate to you. As I stumble around in the snow with a flashlight, being careful not to trip over a frozen cow turd, in my free hand I am carrying a glass of ice water. Really. Flashlight in one hand and ice water in the other.
And in the morning, when I am operating the loader, Shirley is nervous. Because being a good wife, she is opening gates, cutting twine, and operating the chute on the processor. She is also aware that a man that is full of cow drugs, is operating a huge piece of equipment right behind her.
But, they dang sure worked, and when this story is done, I am calling my best friend, the dentist, and making an appointment.

Happy New Year!
And may all your teeth be good!