HAT TIPS
Hello,
Have you ever had that feeling that you were invisible? Or dreamed that you were?
Well, I had better start at the beginning.
Shirley and I belong to a very select group of people that play pinochle on Sunday afternoons. Some of the group plays all year. We get started late in the fall and play through the winter. It’s more of a social event and cooking competition than a money deal. Everyone brings lunch and some days it is nearly a Thanksgiving feast.
It was at pinochle that I became invisible.
When the afternoon’s last hand was played, the lunch line kicks in. Shirley and I grabbed plates and sat down at a table together.
As we were eating, another gentleman came and sat down.
Now remember, Shirley cleans up pretty good. I actually prefer her in Carhart coveralls and mud boots, with a Scotch cap and neckerchief. Or with a baseball cap and chaps on, horseback, bending a cow that is headed for the brush. But I guess beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
Anyway this guy about my age sits down by Shirley. Wanting to strike up a conversation, he is pretty forward. He asks, “Are you married or single?”
Shirley replies that she is indeed married.
This is where I attempt to get into the conversation and realize that I have become invisible.
He asked, “Is your husband good to you?”
She replies that her husband has his good days and bad. That hurt.
Our guest then asked, “How long have you been married?”
Shirley has to think a while, then replies, “Forty-three years!”
So I jump in again. “What a coincidence! That is the same that I have been married!” But I am invisible and now, I guess I have become mute.
Shirley and the guy visit a bit and the guy asks, “When were you married?”
“May 28th, 1971.”
“Wow! That is unreal! That is the same day I was married!” But I am still an invisible mute.
So I start to talk louder. “Where were you married?”
She replies in the Catholic Church at Killdeer.
I think I am starting to come back into focus when I loudly holler, “No way, that is where I was married!”
The guy starts to kind of put two and two together. He notices this 65-year-old, 275-pound man sitting next to Shirley. By now I have regained visibility I guess. He looks at me and didn’t say anything, but now I have gained the ability to read minds. He was thinking, “Shirley, you could have done better!”
And I imagine there are those readers that agree. But maybe today will be one of the good days!
Later,
Dean